Thursday, May 31, 2012
skylar reference
just copied a couple of pics I found online, shape explorations when I come back, sorry man.
Creativity!
Really cool talk on "creativity". Talks a lot about what we learned in Kate's class, "yes anding", "yes let's", etc. Cool talk on hitchcock's process and how he didn't like "pressing", he'd tell random jokes if shit was getting too real.
Most interesting point for me is about creativity in groups of people. Basically, if you're defensive all the time, it is really hard to try and be "creative" in that kind of shitty environment.
Food for thought for your future directing career, late.
Most interesting point for me is about creativity in groups of people. Basically, if you're defensive all the time, it is really hard to try and be "creative" in that kind of shitty environment.
Food for thought for your future directing career, late.
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
May 31st - Screen Play Breakdown Start - End - June 2nd
June 2nd - Beat Boards - June 4th Beat boards Due
June 4th - Start Boarding - June 9th - Boards Due
June 9th - Backgrounds/ Layout Start - June 12 - Background/ Layout Due
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Animation Start - June 13 - Keys 1 week , Break Downs, 1 week.
June 26 breakdowns should almost be done.
While we are doing these things we should also be designing and planning color and some designs.
I can't find an editable Calender...
June 2nd - Beat Boards - June 4th Beat boards Due
June 4th - Start Boarding - June 9th - Boards Due
June 9th - Backgrounds/ Layout Start - June 12 - Background/ Layout Due
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Animation Start - June 13 - Keys 1 week , Break Downs, 1 week.
June 26 breakdowns should almost be done.
While we are doing these things we should also be designing and planning color and some designs.
I can't find an editable Calender...
Sunday, May 27, 2012
McDonald and Advice
First consume these if you haven't:
http://www.paperwingspodcast.com/2012/05/brian-mcdonald/
Anyway, I showed the script to my sister. I got some pretty interesting advice but the thing she most protested over was the end. She was like, and I'm really paraphrasing here: "That's it? that's the end? noooo....what? are you guys done? what? really? what? awww...that's just lazy! finish it!"
She said it was actually interesting and liked it up until the end. She said she felt the end was like the middle, like the dark before the light. I asked her..."do you want a happy ending" and she said "...well, yeah!". Her husband was also there and she basically explained the the story to him and it was kinda funny to hear someone else tell the story without having the "deep" understanding we kinda have.
I noticed though a lot of what she explained was what the story was [a]bout and not what the story was [A]bout, so she started with, it's about this boy who wants to go to the moon...etc. She then said something like "I dunno, you guys should maybe have a message, like a theme", she and her husband actually started giving ideas for "morals" and it was actually varied like "you need to have patience" "sometimes you can't do it by yourself and you need help" and stuff very similar to that, which I think is very close to our "original": "is it worth investing in others".
Those other "morals" they suggested I think actually do all have to do with our "original" because those are the things that come up when you ponder that theme.
My brother-in-law actually suggested something along the lines of maybe they DO go to the moon. That after he falls and she finds him, they're on the roof and TOGETHER, (investing in each other) they make it, they go to the moon.
He said, "maybe they don't actually go to the moon, because that would be too cheesy, but something like that." My sister quickly interjected, "but she's moving!" to which he quickly replied "so what, that's the point of the story, to get to the moon, so what, that's like-" he then flapped his hand in the air as if shooing the non-important point.
To which I agree! to an extent. Remember what McDonald says about how if you have a problem in the third act, it's because you have one in the first. I don't think we have a problem in the first. My sister even while reading it said "no wait, this is getting interesting, I want to see what's going to happen".
I think the third act is the problem if there is a "problem". I think by not "getting to the moon" we may be betraying our audience. The story, we know, isn't about getting to the moon, it's exploring that duality between investing in ourselves or others and this story about a child and his want to get to the moon for the love of someone else is just a vehicle.
I think we need to think more about our "main throughline". Right now I think it's reading soemthing like this:
"it's a story about a boy who wants to get to the moon, he gets help from his friend and she storms off or w/e, he goes off by himself, almost touches the moon, but falls, friend rescues him, and he sips hot chocolate with his friend on a roof"
That's our main throughline, I think maybe after "but falls", primitively it should be something like:
"almost touches the moon, but falls, friend rescues him, try again together, gets to the moon"
again though, maybe it shouldn't be "he gets to the moon"
metaphorically, he should and I know that's what you wanted to do with the cup of hot chocolate, and I feel it works, but maybe it is missing that "big ending".
Like in the McDonald interview with PaperWings though, I do feel like maybe that gesture of her giving him the coffee may in fact be enough. Like he was saying about the whole concentration camp and the apple story, how such a small gesture as him giving her the coffee could be very grand. But it's grand because of what's at stake.
I didn't tell them this, that the hot chocolate was a metaphorical "on the moon" moment, and maybe if they were to see it on the screen the would get it. So take all this "advice" with a grain of salt, maybe what we have is indeed "solid", or at least "solid enough".
I do think though that a lot is riding on that hot chocolate/bowl of water moment. So if that's going to be their "on the moon" scene, then it has to be very, very supported. I'm thinking maybe throughout the story we establish how much, and this is just a thought, how much she looooves hot chocolate so when she does give him her own cup of HC, it's like woah. Or maybe it's very cold outside, we think the HC is for her and she's visibly cold but instead she gives it to him.
Maybe go back to that idea you had about making that decision at the end, but switch it up to Sky. Where, maybe Sky actually wants to now invest in others and says something like, i dunno: "c'mon let's go down to the party" and she's like "you've never liked those" or she gives him a pleasantly surprised look and they head down, camera zooms as they join in, u-haul still there, as they join in the "going away" party.
I actually don't like that ending that much, but I feel it does have some elements of what we've talked about and we have a confirmation on the personal throughline where he changes for the better, he now wants to invest in others.
Since the question of "is it worth investing in others" goes both ways, sometimes it is sometimes, it's not, in life you have to gauge it and if something like someone moving away comes up, investing in others may seem like a total waste of time and may take away from shit that makes you "better", but, like genevieve says "I just want to spend some time with you".
So the answer lies in balance: "I just want to spend SOME time with you". I want to invest in you, but just sometime, not always because sometimes you do have to invest in yourself.
Maybe that whole hot chocolate thing can be after he "learns his lesson" so after he asks her to go down and partake in the event, maybe at the party she give him the hot chocolate and we see the moon, they hug, and bam, tilt up to moon.
One more thing, my sister asked what age they were, I said around seven. I told her about the idea of making them do a time cut and turn into teens, but she didn't really like it.
Overall, I still do kinda like the mom VO as a disembodied voice kinda tormenting him as he's settling his thoughts after the fall. I feel like McDonald talks about, that's the audience's proxy into inquiry of the story, it, in a way, challenges the character, like..."wtf were you thinking man?". I do feel without that he's getting off kind of easy, so if not the mother's voice, SOMETHING needs to go in there. Also I don't feel like he really learns a lesson in the story at the end. This character isn't steadfast right? he first starts out "complacent" but that "call to action" turns him for the worse, challenges his morals and in the end he should come out a "better" person.
The way it is now like I said feels like, he still would maybe go tomorrow by himself and try that shit again. I think there needs to be something that shows, he's willing to invest in others, that he's willing to love even if it means "neglecting" is own "well-being".
So dunno, overall, good feedback, the ending not so hot. The ending I feel is totally valid, especially if you look at things like "Paisan", but the thing about that movies is that the "target" audience maybe already expects it to come, so if it ends open ended, that's cool, if not what makes it great. With our story though, and our "audience" it might disappoint many viewers.
So...dunno where you wan to take it. I feel if we board what we now have, it would at least be "competent" and not a "wtf did I just watch" film.
http://www.paperwingspodcast.com/2012/05/brian-mcdonald/
Anyway, I showed the script to my sister. I got some pretty interesting advice but the thing she most protested over was the end. She was like, and I'm really paraphrasing here: "That's it? that's the end? noooo....what? are you guys done? what? really? what? awww...that's just lazy! finish it!"
She said it was actually interesting and liked it up until the end. She said she felt the end was like the middle, like the dark before the light. I asked her..."do you want a happy ending" and she said "...well, yeah!". Her husband was also there and she basically explained the the story to him and it was kinda funny to hear someone else tell the story without having the "deep" understanding we kinda have.
I noticed though a lot of what she explained was what the story was [a]bout and not what the story was [A]bout, so she started with, it's about this boy who wants to go to the moon...etc. She then said something like "I dunno, you guys should maybe have a message, like a theme", she and her husband actually started giving ideas for "morals" and it was actually varied like "you need to have patience" "sometimes you can't do it by yourself and you need help" and stuff very similar to that, which I think is very close to our "original": "is it worth investing in others".
Those other "morals" they suggested I think actually do all have to do with our "original" because those are the things that come up when you ponder that theme.
My brother-in-law actually suggested something along the lines of maybe they DO go to the moon. That after he falls and she finds him, they're on the roof and TOGETHER, (investing in each other) they make it, they go to the moon.
He said, "maybe they don't actually go to the moon, because that would be too cheesy, but something like that." My sister quickly interjected, "but she's moving!" to which he quickly replied "so what, that's the point of the story, to get to the moon, so what, that's like-" he then flapped his hand in the air as if shooing the non-important point.
To which I agree! to an extent. Remember what McDonald says about how if you have a problem in the third act, it's because you have one in the first. I don't think we have a problem in the first. My sister even while reading it said "no wait, this is getting interesting, I want to see what's going to happen".
I think the third act is the problem if there is a "problem". I think by not "getting to the moon" we may be betraying our audience. The story, we know, isn't about getting to the moon, it's exploring that duality between investing in ourselves or others and this story about a child and his want to get to the moon for the love of someone else is just a vehicle.
I think we need to think more about our "main throughline". Right now I think it's reading soemthing like this:
"it's a story about a boy who wants to get to the moon, he gets help from his friend and she storms off or w/e, he goes off by himself, almost touches the moon, but falls, friend rescues him, and he sips hot chocolate with his friend on a roof"
That's our main throughline, I think maybe after "but falls", primitively it should be something like:
"almost touches the moon, but falls, friend rescues him, try again together, gets to the moon"
again though, maybe it shouldn't be "he gets to the moon"
metaphorically, he should and I know that's what you wanted to do with the cup of hot chocolate, and I feel it works, but maybe it is missing that "big ending".
Like in the McDonald interview with PaperWings though, I do feel like maybe that gesture of her giving him the coffee may in fact be enough. Like he was saying about the whole concentration camp and the apple story, how such a small gesture as him giving her the coffee could be very grand. But it's grand because of what's at stake.
I didn't tell them this, that the hot chocolate was a metaphorical "on the moon" moment, and maybe if they were to see it on the screen the would get it. So take all this "advice" with a grain of salt, maybe what we have is indeed "solid", or at least "solid enough".
I do think though that a lot is riding on that hot chocolate/bowl of water moment. So if that's going to be their "on the moon" scene, then it has to be very, very supported. I'm thinking maybe throughout the story we establish how much, and this is just a thought, how much she looooves hot chocolate so when she does give him her own cup of HC, it's like woah. Or maybe it's very cold outside, we think the HC is for her and she's visibly cold but instead she gives it to him.
Maybe go back to that idea you had about making that decision at the end, but switch it up to Sky. Where, maybe Sky actually wants to now invest in others and says something like, i dunno: "c'mon let's go down to the party" and she's like "you've never liked those" or she gives him a pleasantly surprised look and they head down, camera zooms as they join in, u-haul still there, as they join in the "going away" party.
I actually don't like that ending that much, but I feel it does have some elements of what we've talked about and we have a confirmation on the personal throughline where he changes for the better, he now wants to invest in others.
Since the question of "is it worth investing in others" goes both ways, sometimes it is sometimes, it's not, in life you have to gauge it and if something like someone moving away comes up, investing in others may seem like a total waste of time and may take away from shit that makes you "better", but, like genevieve says "I just want to spend some time with you".
So the answer lies in balance: "I just want to spend SOME time with you". I want to invest in you, but just sometime, not always because sometimes you do have to invest in yourself.
Maybe that whole hot chocolate thing can be after he "learns his lesson" so after he asks her to go down and partake in the event, maybe at the party she give him the hot chocolate and we see the moon, they hug, and bam, tilt up to moon.
One more thing, my sister asked what age they were, I said around seven. I told her about the idea of making them do a time cut and turn into teens, but she didn't really like it.
Overall, I still do kinda like the mom VO as a disembodied voice kinda tormenting him as he's settling his thoughts after the fall. I feel like McDonald talks about, that's the audience's proxy into inquiry of the story, it, in a way, challenges the character, like..."wtf were you thinking man?". I do feel without that he's getting off kind of easy, so if not the mother's voice, SOMETHING needs to go in there. Also I don't feel like he really learns a lesson in the story at the end. This character isn't steadfast right? he first starts out "complacent" but that "call to action" turns him for the worse, challenges his morals and in the end he should come out a "better" person.
The way it is now like I said feels like, he still would maybe go tomorrow by himself and try that shit again. I think there needs to be something that shows, he's willing to invest in others, that he's willing to love even if it means "neglecting" is own "well-being".
So dunno, overall, good feedback, the ending not so hot. The ending I feel is totally valid, especially if you look at things like "Paisan", but the thing about that movies is that the "target" audience maybe already expects it to come, so if it ends open ended, that's cool, if not what makes it great. With our story though, and our "audience" it might disappoint many viewers.
So...dunno where you wan to take it. I feel if we board what we now have, it would at least be "competent" and not a "wtf did I just watch" film.
Saturday, May 26, 2012
space vomit
Just screwing around, not really in a particular order. Now that I look at it though, I guess it is D: I couldn't help myself.
Color Design
For the story, I thought it might be interesting to make the moments where Skylar indulges, or rather, invests in himself to be very saturated, so definitely things like the climax also moments like when he steps out of the house and ignores his mom, or like when he goes "I can almost reach the moon!" and then genevieve's smile kinda goes away, cut to that I'm thinking could be very desaturated.
Moments where "it is not worth it to invest in others" could be desaturated. Moments where she starts to cry after sky yells at her, maybe even when her mom is yelling at her for hanging out with him, or when he falls from the moon and lands among the crowd, I'm thinking especially the end, could be let out very dry and desaturated.
Moments that could be "pastel" or rather, balanced I'm thinking would definitely be at the beginning, the end, where they're on the roof and she gives him the hot chocolate (water, coffee, w/e).
In fact, the entire 2nd act could maybe be a microcosm of the entire story arc. We start with both of these characters lives in shit, in desaturated, boring shit. baby crying, mom about to protest, but then...they meet, colors balance.
Going into the montage, we can start building up in intensity, and when they start to steal things, or rather, sky starts to steal things, that represents a saturated indulgence, so we go full saturation there, building to a foreshadowing of the climax where he can "almost touch it!" and bang! we go desaturated as soon as genevieve gets on screen. Where, maybe even genevieve herself represents a piece of the crowd.
Then we go back to normal colors when she gives him the suit, because they're investing in each other, safe, home, etc.
For cool idea colors, Kuler rocks:
you can even copy the HEX code straight from a color you may like and input it into photoshop. They also have that craig mullins option where you can grab colors from a photo, or a "leaf" and make a color scheme from that.
So yeah, just some thoughts on art directions. Also...are we doing this in flash? or what?
Also, can you upload your character designs? Want to go Shane Prigmore on this thing and really start thinking about what the character would do and not what we THINK the character would do, remember Henry Selick: "That's it! that's her! That's Coraline!"
Character Adjectives
http://personal.georgiasouthern.edu/~jbjoy/Adjectives.html
| able | depressive | indulgent | powerful | strong |
| accomplished |
despised
|
intelligent
|
powerless
| structured |
acid
|
detail oriented
|
intense
|
precious
| stubborn |
adaptable
|
devoted
|
interested
|
prejudiced
| succcessful |
| affective |
devout
|
intolerant
|
presentable
| supercilious |
| ambitious |
difficult
|
introverted
|
prickly
| superficial |
| amoral |
disgusting
|
intuitive
|
prideful
| sweet |
| anal retentive |
dizzy
|
inventive
|
private
| sympathetic |
| angry |
dominant
|
investigative
|
protective
| talented |
| anxious | domineering |
involved
|
quaint
| tall |
| argumentative | dramatic | irresponsible |
quiet
| tender |
| arrogant | dull | irritating |
rageful
| theoretical |
| artistic | eccentric | isolated |
rainy
| tired |
| athletic | educated | itchy |
rambunctious
| tolerant |
| auspicious | egotistical | jittery |
rare
| tough |
| automatic | elegant | jolly |
rational
| tricky |
| awake | emphatic | joyful | ratty | trustworthy |
| awesome | enterprising | judgmental | realistic | trying |
| bad | enthusiastic | keen | reassuring | uncertain |
| beautiful | ethical | kind | receptive | unforgiving |
| bent | excitable | lazy | refreshing | unhealthy |
| better | expansive | loud | religious | unreachable |
| big | expectant | lovable | responsible | unrepentant |
| bigoted | expressive | loving | ridiculous | unusual |
| bitter | extroverted | loyal | robust | unwavering |
| black | faithful | macho | romantic | unwell |
| blue | fawning | magnanimous | rough | vicious |
| bodacious | feared | manipulative | round | violent |
| boiling | feeble | mature | rude | vocal |
| boorish | feminine | mean-spirited | sad | vulnerable |
| bovine | fertile | mighty | saintly | warm |
| bright | fixed | miserly | sarcastic | wasteful |
| brilliant | flighty | modest | satisfied | watery |
| broken | flitting | motivated | scary | well-liked |
| bubbly | foolish | musical | scatter-brained | well-loved |
| careful | forgetful | narcissistic | scientific | well-bred |
| careless | fragile | narrow-minded | scrawny | wide-eyed |
| casual | frail | nasty | scrupulous | wise |
| certain | friendly | natural | secretive | worldly |
| cheap | funny | needed | secure | worried |
| childish | generous | needy | seductive | young |
| childlike | gentle | new | self-conscious | zany |
| clean | gifted | nihilistic | self-centered | zealous |
| clear-headed | fifantic | noble | sensitive | |
| cloddish | good | nosy | serious | |
| clumsy | great | nurturing | shallow | |
| cold | grumpy | nutty | sharp | |
| common | happy | obsequious | short | |
| complacent | hardheaded | obsessive | shy | |
| complex | hardworking | officious | sickening | |
| confused | harmful | old | silly | |
| conscientious | harmless | open-minded | simple | |
| conventional | hasty | open | sincere | |
| cool | haughty | opinionated | skeptical | |
| courteous | healthy | optimistic | skittish | |
| crazy | hearty | orderly | sloppy | |
| creative | helpful | ordinary | slow | |
| critical | high-spirited | outgoing | smooth | |
| cruel | horrible | overbearing | snotty | |
| curious | hostile | paranoid | sociable | |
| daring | humorous | particular | social | |
| dear | idealistic | passionate | spacey | |
| deceiving | ignorant | pathetic | spiritual | |
| deep | imaginative | patient | spiteful | |
| delicate | immature | patriotic | sterile | |
| demanding | immoral | perfectionistic | stiff | |
| dependable | independent | pessimistic | stingy | |
| dependent | indifferent | placid | strange |
Friday, May 25, 2012
Ridley Scott on storyboards
Maybe you're already seen this, but I thought the part on dialogue and how "talking heads" could be interesting is real cool, because like you said, if the story calls for it, then that's what it needs.
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Kids just don't like dealing with dialogue
I know I've mentioned these guys to you before and although I think you should listen to just about ALL their podcasts, this one is pretty relevant:
http://guyswithpencils.tumblr.com/post/23507931656/mayerson-far-right-guys-with-pencils-ep-60
The dude is some sort of professional mentor at Sheridan and one of the things he talks about is how some of his kids at Sheridan don't like dealing with dialogue.
I like what Lyndon says that most of the emotion should be just conveyed with poses, pacing, and staging, but this guy says dialogue is something that SHOULD be done. Anyway, just thought it was interesting.
http://guyswithpencils.tumblr.com/post/23507931656/mayerson-far-right-guys-with-pencils-ep-60
The dude is some sort of professional mentor at Sheridan and one of the things he talks about is how some of his kids at Sheridan don't like dealing with dialogue.
I like what Lyndon says that most of the emotion should be just conveyed with poses, pacing, and staging, but this guy says dialogue is something that SHOULD be done. Anyway, just thought it was interesting.
Cinemagraphs and illustrated gifs
So, these are like illustrations, that move, more specifically only one thing moves, thought it'd be an interesting avenue to explore for the cut scenes or anything really. Put in some illustrations that this chick rebecca sugar makes for episodes of adventure time and other shows she boards on.
The last two are from this super awesome tumblr:
Hertzfeldt vignettes
We can maybe even go experimental on some scenes if we need that ethereal feeling on things. Go to 10:50 for more experimental short story vignettes.
Finished Screenplay - Non edit
Sky to the moon
Fade in - Outer Space - But in Crayon
A rocket ship is sailing over a sea of sparkling stars and colorful planets.
Sky - Vo
Vrrrrrrrghhwooooooooooooosh
bright flashes cut through the void.
Genevieve - Vo
Meteorites!
SKY - VO
I got it!
A ship glides smoothly and effortlessly through the gaps between the meteorites. Genevieve giggles, followed by a gasp.
GENEVIEVE - VO
There it is...
GENEVIEVE & Sky Vo
THE MUSHROOM PLANET
SKY - VO
Hold on tight Genevieve! I'm bringing her in for a landing.
Sky and Genevieve both make shaky noises simulating turbulence while shaking the book.
SKY - VO
Its gonna be a bumpy rideehuhuheh!
Both laugh - we pull out to see a young
boy and girl (Sky and Genvieve) on the shingled roof of a house
overlooking the small town of Wanacreville.
Both of them laughing as we pull out revealing the book and the moon which overwhelms the screen with bright light.
Sky and Genevieve are laying on a small shingled rooftop overlooking the city of Wanacreville.
Sky is smiling contentedly and turns slowly to look up at the moon
SKY
Where do you think the mushroom planet is at?
Genevieve leans over to Sky and whispers
GENEVIEVE
Maybe it's the moon.
Sky still staring at the moon now even more wide eyed
SKY
Maybe...
And he sits up quickly
SKY
Maybe we can go there!
GENEVIEVE
But how will we get there?
Sky quickly grabs the wonderful flight to mushroom planet book and plops it down and points to the cover
SKY
With that! We can build it
GENEVIEVE
Can I help! I promise I'll work hard.
SKY
Eh...sure why not you can be my Lieutenant. And I'll be the captain.
GENEVIEVE
You promise!
SKY
I promise.
Gen and sky both laugh. Suddenly a harsh woman's voice interrupts.
GENEVIEVE mom
Genevieve? Genevieve!
Genevieve gives Sky a look of disappointment
GENEVIEVE
I guess I gotta go, Cya...And don't forget.
Sky watches Gen as she hurries down.
GENEVIEVE MOM
Genevieve! What were you doing up there young lady? And with that boy!
GENEVIEVE
but hes my friend..
GENEVIEVE MOM
Nevermind him! Go on and wash up before your dad gets
home! We have a lot to talk about - Your dad got a better job, we are
moving to Tuacreville.
Convo between Gen and her Mom is overheard by Sky.
ACT 2 Fade to black
Enter Skys kitchen 8 AM
Sky is walking downstairs, we hear chaos
- a crying baby, food cooking, etc. Sky's mom emerges from the messy
kitchen carrying the baby. A well dressed man rushes down the stairs,
pushing by both Sky and his mom, towards the front door.
SKYS MOM
Come get some breakfast sweetie. You look awfully tired
Skys DAD
Bye honey Bye kids
Sky's eyes follow his dad.
SKY
I'm going to go out for a bit ok mom.
Sky's Mom turns to him, mouth open as if
she were about to protest, when the phone rings. She sighs with
resignation, turns and answers the phone, baby in hand.
Outside - Morning - green field - Sunny Day
We enter as Sky and Genevieve are walking through a tree filled park, deep in conversation.
GENEVIEVE
So how are we gonna build this?
She has her nose down and flips through blueprints as they walk. Sky suddenly stops and Genevieve bumps into his back.
GENEVIEVE
ooof!...hey whats the big idea?
SKY
That!
Sky points up to an enormous tree.
GENEVIEVE
Ok then...lets do it.
Montage - Buildig the ramp
Sky and Gen are collecting wood from an old Barn
Sky and Gen are going around town stealing a ton of Fire Extinguishers a trash can and some small bike tires.
Sky and Gen are hammering and cutting wood Sky is welding some things to the trash can.
Sky and Gen are making a pulley system to pull each other up to the branch of the tree
(all of this is happening from morning to night it ends at night)
Sky is perched high on branch, hammering the final nail.
Sky
FINISHED! LOOK I CAN ALMOST TOUCH IT!
Sky is reaching and grabbing at the full
moon, casting his silhouette on Genevieve. At first she is smiling, but
it fades, she looks close to tears. She calls to him:
GENEVIEVE
GREAT, NOW COME DOWN!!
Sky is exuberant when he reaches the bottom of the ladder, Genevieve approaches slowly with her hands behind her back.
GENEVIEVE
close your eyes.
GENEVIEVE
Just do it!
Sky squints his face and closes his eyes
ok ok, now stick out your hand,
Sky slowly extend his hands not sure of where to point them till he feels something cloth like and almost rigid made
GENEVIEVE
OK.. now open!
Sky slowly opens his eyes to reveal a rather professional looking homemade spacesuit, neatly folded.
Sky takes a moment to examine the suit looking at it closely turning it inside out and twisting it around, Genevieve looks
at Sky with an confused look
GENEVIEVE
So do you like it..?
We see his lips slowly arching upwards as a smile is filling the screen hes in awe.
Fade to black
Genevieve and Sky are sitting by the makeshift rocket ship
She seems hesitant about something,
giving him quick glances and awkwardly trying to find a way to start a
conversation (breaking the news to sky about her leaving)
GENEVIEVE
Sky...
His head slightly tilt towards her direction to take a look at her.
GENEVIEVE
I want to tell you something. It's kind of not good ne...well its actually good news for my family.
My dad just got a new job at Tuareacreville, and my mom says that we have to move there so it will be easier for him.
My dad just got a new job at Tuareacreville, and my mom says that we have to move there so it will be easier for him.
Sky is busy tinkering with his rocket ship. He pays her little mind.
GENEVIEVE
I don't really want to go...we been..
she turns towards him and slightly leans over his shoulder...trying to hide her emotions.
SKY
Can you pass me the 12 Gauge wrench over there.
she grabs the wrench and hands it to him
and quickly decides to change the subject.
GENEVIEVE
Did you hear about the fireworks tomorrow in the town square?
GENEVIEVE
I heard that it was gonna be the best one this year. They have all (insert rambling of stuff)
Sky moves in closer into the rocket ship hull dampening Genevieve's voice.
Genevieve's hands comes closer and taps his shoulders.
Sky quickly pulls back and bumps his head...
SKY
I don't want to go!
Genevieve looks at him. Her eyes begins to well up
but she still smiles..
GENEVIEVE
It will be fun if..
Sky quickly interrupts her
SKY
I don't have time for fun! I have to get this done!
Still she is trying to hold back her tears and stay strong...
GENEVIEVE
I...I, just..
every word takes every ounce of strength
for her to speak...her lips are moving but the words are softly, slowly
coming...breaking as her tears began to fall
GENEVIEVE
wanted...to spend some time with you..
Sky holds his ground trying to focus all his attention to his work...but we can see that it is hurting him as well.
A familiar voice breaks the tension
GENEVIEVE MOM
Genevieve!....Genevieve
GENEVIEVE
I have to go now...I'm sorry If i bothered you.
Genevieve runs off towards the field
exiting the tree shrubs. Sky is tightening a nut and it suddenly
breaks...he drops the wrench. and stares up at the moon.
Light up the night sky - Climax
Fade in
Next day - Sky overslept and it is almost night time again.
The fireworks are blazing the skies,
people are celebrating and cheering, kids are playing and foods are
cooking. A picturesque community. Sky heads out the door and we are
greeted with a loud bang. He has his spacesuit on from the night
before, his helmet on his side. He heads towards the ramp with a look
of determination. Genevieve can be seen with her parents from afar: she
looks happy, sky looks back a slight and pauses for a moment and
continues onward.
He prepares the ramp, winding up the
sling system that he developed and checking all the controls.
Everything seems good and sturdy. he pulls off the covering off the
rocket ship
(maybe insert silly drawing on the panel of the rocket ship that can apply to sky and gen almost like their logo and symbol)
he looks at the empty seat in the
back...pauses and looks up at the moon...It is time. He puts on his
helmet and closes his visor shut...all is silence now the fireworks is
all but a muffled sound of everything that plagues his mind. He straps
himself down...starts the controls grabs a hammer and chucks it at the
lever of the pulley system which then quickly launches the ship up the
ramp. Up up up hes gaining speed and quickly hits one of the buttons
labeled EXE - and the fire extinguishers shoots out a stream of white
co2 which beautifully leaves a trail in the air. Hes gaining more speed
hes more than halfway up the ramp now and not slowing down and soon hes
off! and to his amazement it actually works...his face is filled with
excitement as hes about 150 feet in the air. The moon has never been so
full it's a marvelous sight. His expression is bliss - quickly he
launches the other extinguishers opening up the rear pack of the rocket
revealing 100 or so extinguisers all going off all at once as as soon
as one dies off it falls to the ground. Hes up another 50 feet, so
close. We see his visor filling the screen with the reflection of the
moon (almost like the scene from 2001 space odyssey) His face is full
of wonder and excitement, but all of that slowly comes into danger as
he realises that his momementum is slowing down. He panics, the inside
of the ship is flashing red hes pressing all the buttons trying to
regain control of his trajectory...there is only one extinguiser
left...he hits it giving him just enough boost that he can feel the
presence of the moon...but only enough...he stares at the eject
button...sweating in his helmet, heart race pumping he hits it and the
overhead cockpit doors flies open. The wind is strong and almost
overpowers him...he struggles to climb out but the belt is caught on
something he tears at it tears harder and harder it rips! he quickly
steps on the nose of the ship.
And with all of that is left of him he
leaps! reaching and reaching for the moon...its there right there in
front of his eyes his hands are almost touching it. He closes his eyes
and then his hands, taking in the moment: it feels like an eternity.
Realizing that its not there...hes too far away...too far for his
vehicle this is as far as it will allow him to go...gravity takes
control and he begins to fall plummeting to the ground.
Fade to black
What has become
A car pulls up in front of skys house his mom comes out the car to help sky out.
SKYS MOM
the doctor said you were lucky you came out of that
with just a few bone fractures and a broken arm. He said something
helped break your fall but hes not sure what it was...some sort of
costume...but anyway. Why in the world would you do that anway...build
that contraption to shoot yourself to where.
SKYS MOM
Your smart boy Sky did you really think that you could of shot yourself to the moon with just a few extinguishers and a ramp.
Sky looks at his mom. She pats him on the head.
SKYS MOM
It's ok sweety...at least your ok now. That little girl Genevieve has been by a lot. She was really worried about you.
Sky looks at his mom again
SKY
I'm sorry...
SKYS MOM
Sorry for what.
sky quietly walks into the house.
(fade to black or pan up to window)
Sky is in his room now sitting on his bed
with a cast on his right leg and his left arm. staring at the moon. its
a crecent shape. he opens the roof window
we are out on the roof again
he sits quietly out in the night. he
takes a deep breath its chilly. He has nothing on but a t shirt and
sweat pants. Soon Genevieve comes in through his roof window. Shes
bundled up with a scar, big coat, and her pjs and slippers, shes
holding a nice big mug of something steamy. it has a lid it on. She
quietly sits next to him and stares at the moon.
GENEVIEVE
I knew i would find you here...how are you feeling.
SKY
I almost touched it...almost.
Genevieve smiles at sky.
GENEVIEVE
Hey I made this for you...I made lots so I thought I'd bring you some...
She hands sky the mug of steamy goodness.
His hands graze her gloves. the mug is warm. He holds it by his chest
for a moment taking in the aroma...and opens the lid. Genevieve begins
to giggle
GENEVIEVE
you remmeber how we would come up here and stare at the moon
Her voice slowly begins to muffle as he
brings the cup closer to him. everything is slow and silent she is
talking...he stares into the cup...the reflection of the moon is gently
riding the slight disturbances in the mug of hot chocolate...he smiles
genevieve is still talking she is just happy that hes ok. he closes his
eyes and a tear begins to slowly form. he slowly sets the mug down and
turns towards genevieve and leans over to give her a hug. She is
still...he is still.
SKY
I'm sorry...I don't want you to go.
pull up to the moon as we fade out to the next morning.
Sky has not slept a wink its 6:30 am. He
goes downstairs to see his mom asleep on the sofa with emily also sound
asleep in the cradle next to her...the dishes are not cleaned shes
knocked out from being overworked and exhausted. His dad is not there.
He walks up to his mom and pulls a blanket up to her shoulder tucking
her in. he does the same for the Emily.
and heads towards the kitchen. He finishes doing the dishes.
its 8 am in
the morning he walks outside to see Genevieve and her family packing.
Genevieve is carrying a box full of stuff marked fragile. She stops and
turns to look at Sky.
GENEVIEVE MOM
Genevieve! hurry sweetie we are running late.
END.
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Story Stuff
As I see it:
We start Act I by introducing the characters, setting, and situation. So we talked about apollo 13, we could start out with the long take into the window; broken down:
Act I: Introduces Skylar and Genevive, our main characters. The setting from the initial long take reveals a rather urban environment. We have two characters who are rather obsessed with space, it is the apollo 13 era after all (maybe indicate with radio and posters, even t-shirts, mugs, stickers, shit you get when an even is happening; swag type stuff; comic-con).
The boy however is a little more adventurous than the girl, a little bit more dreamy and maybe unrealistic. This drives him to make the decision to build a rocket ship! he wants to get away, his parents just dont understand him. He however, never really does anything because he has Genevieve and that's all he really needs.
Inciting incident: we soon learn though, on a very dark and dreary day that she's moving away. Skylar is crushed, that's all he has and it's being taken away, goodbye Toto.
Plot Point I: This is the event that takes him away from his everyday life, the gauntlet has been thrown, it's either now or never, that rocket is getting built. He may have stopped because he didn't have the tools, means, or the resolve, but it's time to man up.
Act II: Montage. Here, he faces his demons. The world is essentially against him. With Genevieve at his side though, he's unstoppable. Sure, maybe he has to steal some things, maybe cut down sacred trees, break into shops to which Genevieve is very much opposed and slowly starts to dissolve his relationship with her, but he's doing this for Genevieve, it's all for her, he's invested everything he's ever had, his "honor", pride, his family, the eco system, all for her.
His obsession starts to transform him, maybe even literally.
Plot Point II: Until one day, the event that takes him into the abyss happens. Fourth of July, Genevieve is still there, albeit out of maybe... pity, duty, loyalty, she's there. He then asks her for a tool, a look of horror comes over her as she realizes she's handed him the wrong one, he throws it down towards her shadow, or at least maybe what he thought was her shadow.
Turns out he actually struck her, she put her hands up to defend herself and maybe winds up with a crescent shaped wound on her hand, she runs away and skylar tries to explain he didn't meant to hit her, but objectively, he did.
Act III: Here, we see how these two are able to succeed, and maybe even how Skylar becomes a better person; it's his trip to the moon. Skylar says fuck it, the fireworks are as strong as ever, almost as if the sky was on fire. Genevieve's run off to play with the other kids and Skylar's just finished up his ship.
Climax: highest point of dramatic tension here, this is the put up or shut up moment for Skylar. He almost got away, almost achieved his big picture storyline, but failed.
Resolution: Here we tie together all this shit we've built up. Skylar falls into the vast crowd, the crowd of trees. He's nothing but a failure. Genevieve rushes out to him. Reveal special moon suit. Resolution is quick as we cut out to the same roof scene from the beginning, make it visually memorable like eternal sunshine's blinding window.
They hold hands and he feels the bandages, maybe unwraps them to reveal the crescent shaped scar, looks are exchanged, and she gives him that bowl of water with the moons reflection.
End.
I'm still not sure about the bowl of water. I understand its symbollic meaning, but why would she give him a bowl of water? Does he suffer from dehydration much? It should somehow, whatever the reason, be implemented in the story better. I put in the crescent moon scar thing cause I thought it made more sense, maybe you could put both or none at all, or just keep the water bowl thing.
If water bowl thing, again, why? metaphorical reason is solid, but, the logical part of it is kind of off. yeah it's the end, and emotion should be driving this thing, but, still the bowl lacks any logical reasoning.
If you did already tell me though, I forgot, so let me know!
Change whatever you want, this is just the way I see it from what you've told me.
Hope your summer's going well and sorry for being flakey, but although we got internet, it's kind of weird to work on my stuff. It's actually kind of spiritually killing me D:
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
Doppelbänger
Here is the guys video its about 6 mins long starts off good but it didn't finish so its a work in progress.
Saturday, May 19, 2012
Hey Mike I've been thinking about this long and hard and I figured out how to make this short and sweet and still hold the same meaning and actually I feel like its even better because now its just between them without all of this sidetrack story. We start the scene at when they are 14 and this story will take place in I'm guessing the time period is a week (it really doesn't matter). So I've looked through the story spine and redid it in that fashion but still keeping some of the stuff that we worked on. The big change is that Genevieve is forced to move outside of Wanacreville and Sky is in a rush to realize both their dreams (technically his dream because her dream is just to be with him). That is the twister the uncontrollable incident that forces them/him to take action. But this is where our story differs slightly he becomes obsessed over achieving this goal subconsciously its for her but hes viewing it in a logical way (so lead to argument climax etc...which we have) The ending stays the same but the beginning slightly changes.
So here in the story spine format
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Once upon a time there lived a young boy by the name of Sky and a young girl name Genevieve.
Sky and Genevieve were the best est of best friends, they were inseparable.
And every night Sky & Genevieve would sneak out to the top of the roof to gaze at the moon and stars, wishing that one day they would be able to go there together .
But one day Genevieve finds out that her family had to move out of their home in Wanacreville (insert whatever drama I'm thinking dad gets a new job outside of the small town). This saddens Sky and Genevieve a lot.
And because of this Sky set off in a hurry to build a rocket ship in hopes of being able to fly to the moon before Genevieve had to go.
But soon he became engulfed and obsessed over the project and began to neglect the very core reason of why he did this in the first place.
Until finally he set off in his rocket ship alone and soon falling to his doom.
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
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